APRIL FOOL!!

Today I have class at 1030am but my phone keep ringing for like 20 times at about 8am..how I wish I can throw my phone toward the wall and just crash it..I awake at almost 9am...n there is a lot of miss call from my yw.... then I call back using whatapps and donna what the hell had happen to my internet, it juz won't allow me to call....n then my dear yw keeop sending me ...gosh, can U pls pick up d phone....I m like hey, not my fault... feeling frustrated, I call yw using my phone... she said she was coming to IMU to meet me...n then when she heard my angry voice( I THINK IT ACTUALLY FRIGHTENED HER)... she say it was just an April fool.... well, dear yw, U fail this time...heheheheh...I still remember U trick me during high school... now U had failed...wahahahhaah...huo Kai!!!!..... but after all...I still love U very much la., my yw...hahahhaha....Happy April Fool to everyone.... hope I can tricks someone today...hahahah

STUPID?

New day new start with new way....but end up i felt myself become a very stupid person...today when i met her, she started talking about her personal feeling about my another friend and then i am like okay, well, i should also start become more concern about her personal thing...whatapps her and asked her things and the replying was just too cold...I am like okay, FINE!!, what am i doing those kind of stupid thing again to her ?..it is just a waste of time...NO WORRIES, i will not do it for the second times.....ya, maybe she felt that i was bothering her with whatapps message.....ya, maybe she was too lazy replying nonsense and boring whatapps message....oo, well,


I JUST WANT TO SAY I AM SO SORRY FOR BOTHERING OR INTERRUPTING YOU...
U FEEL FRUSTRATED ?...CAUS I AM FEELING THAT WAY TOO...
U FEEL IS SUCH A WASTE OF TIME?...CAUSE I AM ALSO FEELING THAT WAY TOO
DO YOU KNOW WHY I ASK  YOU IN WHATAPPS?...CAUS I DON WAN TO LET OTHER PEOPLE KNOW I AM ACTUALLY PICKING A FIGHT WITH YOU..THAT IS A PROVE THAT I AM INNOCENCE IN CASE SOMETHING HAPPEN
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPEN BETWEEN US?...THERE IS NOTHING IN BETWEEN EXCEPT HATRES...
THE WORLD IS ROUND....BUT
PLS BE CLEAR THAT I AM NOT SURROUND YOU ANYMORE...

INVITE

last time, she invited my group out and this time we actually invite her out....but then maybe wrong timing caus all of the girls are busy with their own things...so, they just turn down our invitation....shockingly, it end up 4 of us ate with those boys..the situation is quite awkward as very little people are actually talking....2 groups in the same table...but it end up with a quite good way..so, i guess, 2 groups have make their first move with a little success this time...i actually go and talk to her today and even whatapps her and ask her something....it end up with a very cold conversation as i dunno how to continue the conversation....she actually smile and talk to my group...i guess we are making a good move on now....n btw, i change her name in my phone contact...although is actually the same person but then i feel that they are totally different now...i even call her by using her new name..n she reply me .....i feel quite comfortable to call her the new name...when i call the name i usually used, it actually bring back memories...yupe, so in conclusion, i guess things are better in the new way....let just start with a new way now...!!!!

CLEAR

To you,
so, after all, i have a lot of negative comments about my friends outing with her friends. Well, i know it from the start that it will never end so well .....i know you had been trying hard to bring our class unite and i am so appreciate the things that you had done..really thank you for being trying although it never end up so perfectly....i am wondering, when i want to be the same group with you during foundation, it never been in a group..but when i want to be away from you, we will surely be in the same group...we in the same group in mentor mentee system...guess what, you spoke to me for the first time in last week...i m like OMG...but then i did not response much as you talked about her personal thing...srry, i guess i am not like last year anymore..the one who always care about yr everything including personal life....the reason is because i hold on to the hate you made....the one that abandon me and away from me to new friends...i guess i will always rmb that....the first week of degree, you really make me feel like i am in hell...yupe, suffering and struggling...i really want to stay contact with you...but then is not like last year anymore...when my friends return from the outing, someone told me that they totally understand the feeling i suffered when i am in the foundation group...ya, i guess you never change much ya...juz change to someone really different from last year....really different...but i think i am also different to you....caus i used to be like that in high school...i dunno why when i am with you, i change and become a different person....i think i m too stupid to did that...the last word for today post is....I M RETURNING!!!

INTERACTION?

So, I woke up late today and missed my class. When I call my friend, they say they are with her group and ask me to come along. When I reach there, they say they are going out with them to Subang. What should I response to such thing? Go? Not go?.. ya, I finally decide I will stay at IMU and just do whatever crape I can. Haha.... what I actually want to achieve?.. I risk myself and sort of argue with her that night and risk myself again to tell my group to unite. When they are uniting, I just cannot make the first move. I JUST CANNOT!!!!  WTH am I actually doing now? ...... when my friend ask me to go out I am like keep repeating MOVE  in my mind....OMG, JUST MOVE!!! But then when I saw her walk passed , I back off...I just back off...I really donna who to do now?...I am the one who encourage my group to unite, but when time come , I just back off... felt so sorry to my friends now, I think they are actually uniting and create some chance for me to go toward her. Sorry, I think I just let them disappointed.  I felt so disappointed to myself too. I keep on promise myself that I will go to her but I think that day will never come, that day will not occur, that day will only appear in the past not now, the day we last talk just end here.


Walk Away
I watch you walk away from me
The tears in my heart start to fall
I ask myself how did we lose it all
For the first time, I had no words to you
For the first time, I am confuse to you
For the first time, I do not know what am I doing
I cling to old memories
And I watch you walk away
Maybe I just don't want to let us walk away
Walk to separate direction
But inside I know I must
As the situation don't allow
My heart's whimpering with pain
To watch you walk away
But it's my mind I trust
Sometimes, there's confusion around me
Sometimes, there's a pain in my heart
Sometimes, there's numbness in my feeling
But looking you walk away
I just fell apart
If only I could handle it
And bear to just say
Will I use my breath and say
Don't walk away???